Sleepless
Reed’s
Realm
Reed
rolled his head to the right on top of his pillow to take another quick glance
at the alarm clock sitting on the small night stand beside his bed. The red numbers on the clock read
Even
though it had been close to one in the morning before he’d made his way into
bed, after a day full of chases, stake outs, and breakthroughs, he had expected
to be able to fall asleep. He’d been
exhausted, feeling every moment of the day in his bones like bruises. Given how ready he’d been for bed, tossing
and turning had been the farthest thing from his mind.
This is total bullshit, Reed thought to himself.
He knew
that tomorrow would be the day that he would start looking for Willings and he wanted to be at his best, not dragging ass
because he hadn’t slept. As he lay there,
he tried to convince himself that it was the case that he was thinking about and
that it was looming over him like his own personal rain cloud. Whether or not these murders were turning
into his own personal white whale was debatable, but the
case was definitely turning out to be a lot more consuming than he ever thought
it was going to be. If someone would
have told him that Kerrigan’s murder would have set off a chain reaction that
was filled with unexplained autopsy results and ultimately his chasing of
someone who was presumed dead, he would have never believed it. This case was definitely turning out to be
one of the hardest and strangest cases he had ever worked.
Even
considering all those facts, Reed knew too well why he was not able to sleep
this night. Was the true reason something
that happened earlier in the day? Yes,
it was. Did it have to do with the case?
No, it didn’t.
Instead,
what was keeping him awake was five minutes; the five minutes that Reed waited
with his back against the brick wall of the building down at the port, waiting
for Martin to get into position. During
those five minutes, Reed’s mind had slipped into the past and his thoughts had
turned to Samantha.
During the
day, Reed always stayed focused with so much work to do that he didn’t slow
down, much less stop, from the time he got up until the time he went to
bed. However, it was those other hours after
work that made up the rest of the twenty-four that in a lot of ways were the
hardest hours for him to face. Those
were the hours when he was at home, lying in bed, with the entire world locked
outside of his bedroom. During that
time, he wasn’t always able to distract himself from his most painful thoughts.
Most of
the time, his body and mind slowly wound down at the same pace and before he
knew it, he was rubbing his eyes and turning off the alarm clock, thinking that
he had just set the damn thing and it was already time to get up. But that was not always the case. There were times when his tired body wound
down, but his mind continued to run at 110 miles per hour, and no matter how
much he tried, he could not slow it down enough to go to sleep.
Reed
wanted to close his eyes again, but every time he did, he only saw
Samantha. It was always the image of her
standing in the living room of their apartment in
“I am sorry Reed. I can’t do this anymore. I am leaving here. And I’m leaving you.”
Those were
the words that seemed to play over and over inside his head. Every syllable was like a knife. Reed remembered every moment of his last days
with his wife, but that one scene was the one that haunted him the most.
“Everything will be okay, Sam. I’ll see you tonight. We’ll talk this all out, okay?”
“Why
couldn’t you have just stayed?” Reed whispered out loud, still looking at the
ceiling fan. “Why did you have to
go? We could have worked things out.”
Reed
remembered returning home that day like it was yesterday.
“Sam, I’m back,” Reed said as he
unlocked and opened the front door to their small apartment. Samantha had wanted to buy a house, but Reed
knew that he would be reassigned to a field office at any time, so he convinced
her that an apartment was more practical.
She’d agreed to continue the apartment dwellers life, for a while.
Reed closed the front door behind
him and sat down his pistol case.
“You won’t believe what happened at
the range,” Reed said, still getting no response.
Reed walked into the kitchen,
hoping to find Samantha, but she wasn’t there.
He walked over and opened the fridge, getting out a Coke and popping the
top. Indulging in his favorite soda made
his bad days go a little easier.
Reed shut the refrigerator door and
heard only silence. He knew that
Samantha must still be upset. Her
dissatisfaction with the time he spent away from home had been growing
lately. While he was spending more time
learning his craft and impressing his superiors, Samantha wanting him home more
and wanted to start a family. He wanted
that too, but not now.
Reed walked into the hall heading
towards their bedroom. “Look Sam, I’m
sorry you were upset. I’m here now and I
want to talk this all out just like I said, okay,” Reed finished as he made his
way to the bedroom.
Reed paused for a moment and stared
at the closed door, trying to find the right words that he could say to her to
explain how he felt when he walked into the room to face her.
“Sam,” Reed called in a calm
voice. “Can I come in?”
There was no response. Reed reached out and lightly knocked on the
door. Again there was no response. An empty feeling began growing in his gut.
Reed reached down and turned the knob,
slowly opening the door. “Samantha,”
Reed called out once more. No one
answered, and it became clear to him once the door was opened.
“Oh no,” Reed said, as he looked
into the room to find her gone.
He hastily flipped on the light as
if doing so would make her appear. Instead, it illuminated what he already knew
he was seeing. The dresser that once
held her things was now abandoned. All
of the drawers were scattered on the floor empty. Her side of the sliding closet door was
opened, showing that all of her clothes had been taken out. There were only a few hangers remaining.
Reed walked over to his bed in a
state of shock, trying to digest the fact that she was really gone. No matter how many times he closed his eyes
and opened them again, he was still alone in the room. Samantha actually left him.
Reed slowly lied back onto the bed
and just stared up at the ceiling as tears started to well up in the corners of
his eyes.
Reed
thought about how ironic it was. It didn’t
matter how many years had gone by, and it didn’t matter where he was at. When it came to Sam, he always ended up flat
on his back, looking at the ceiling, and wondering what the hell had happened. Something about the woman, or about how Reed
had handled his relationship with her, haunted him like a ghost with a grudge.
“Ah, why
can’t I just go to sleep?” Reed pleaded out loud, his voice filled with
frustration.
Reed knew
that he would never get to sleep while his mind was stuck on Samantha and the
life with her that he threw away. He
hated to admit that he had regrets, and she was his biggest ever. The family he always wanted would have been
with her. He’d given up that dream when
she’d left him. Work consumed him now,
and even the possibility of finding a woman who could live with him seemed
impossible.
The
officer decided to try to pull his mind off those bygone possibilities by
thinking about the case. Retracing all
of the steps in the case might help him see a new place to look for clues, and
would get his mind off of Samantha long enough to fall asleep. There might be some detail that he might have
at one time overlooked. And when it all
came down to it, as sad as it was, he would rather think about the two grizzly
murders than think of Samantha. Even as
he began to roll the facts of the Simmons and Kerigan
files through his mind, Reed knew that more than likely, like so many other
nights when his former wife entered his mind, nothing would push her from his
thoughts.
From the
first moment Reed had entered the parking garage where they’d found Kerigan and joined Martin in examining the crime scene, he
should have known that the case was going to plague him. The murder scene hadn’t made sense to him or
Martin. Both of them had their own
strengths and weaknesses, but above all, they were good cops. Given that they couldn’t get a handle on the Kerigan murder from the beginning should have been a red
flag.
The only
good thing to come out of the investigation was that Martin and Reed were
working together so much more. Reed had always
respected Martin and thought that he was one of the best young detectives that were
in the department. Even though they had
worked a few short cases previously, they had never developed a close
friendship like they were forging with this case.
Martin was
a good man. He brought a lot of energy
and enthusiasm to working the case. Reed
knew that it was because Martin was born and raised right here in
Shortly
after Reed met Martin, the young policeman said something that Reed still
hadn’t forgotten. Martin said, “These streets belong to the good people
of
Reed later
learned why Martin wanted to give second chances to criminals. Not so long before, Martin had been one of
those juveniles on the wrong path and headed to a world of crime and
prison. Martin had an insight on how it
could happen, and even though Reed didn’t necessarily think all of
Deep down,
on his most optimistic day, Reed just didn’t think that everyone one was good. He thought that there were people that were
so evil that they could not be turned around, no matter how many chances they
were given. To those kind of people, another
chance meant another victim; another case, and in some cases, another body.
Thoughts
of Kerrigan and Jo Jo entered Reed’s mind. He could see their bodies,
portions of them ripped opened, pools of their blood around them. Grotesque images flashed back and forth
behind his eyes. It was as if he were
standing in a dark room surrounded by photos of the crime scenes, unable to see
them until the flash of a camera gave him small glimpses of the horror left
behind by someone who indeed didn’t deserve a second chance.
Reed
opened his eyes and again looked at the ceiling fan slowly turning overhead. He rolled over and picked up the half empty
water bottle he’d sat on the floor earlier.
He turned to his right side, propping himself up on his right elbow and
taking a long drink. He replaced the cap
and this time sat the empty bottle on the night stand by his bed. He stared in disgust at the alarm clock,
which told him that it was eight minutes until four.
Reed relaxed
his muscles at once, letting his body fall into the bed, his head slamming into
his pillow. He began to think about all
of the things that could be out there, in the dark, related to the Kerigan case. He
knew it would take more than short flashes to shed enough light on them for the
puzzle to start making sense. Thousands
of questions seemed to swirl around in his head. Most he’d asked himself
before, but couldn’t quite grasp the answers.
How were the murders related?
Were they both pure drug deals gone south? Could it be that simple? What were the causes of the abnormal autopsy
results found by Dr. Fox? Was it just a
strange coincidence that he was now chasing someone that was on the record as
being killed at sea? It wasn’t that one
small thing didn’t make sense. The
problem was that nothing made sense. And
every time he felt he was close to an answer, he only found more
questions.
Reed knew
that there was a lot more to this case than he knew, and even though he hoped
to catch Willings, he knew that he was not the person
pulling all the strings. There was
something larger going on out there that he had no way to discover and too
little creativity to imagine. He was
grasping at straws and following the only lead he had.
Reed lay
there in bed trying to clear his cluttered head when the silence around him was
broken by a small monotone beeping. His cell phone. The
particular tone that the phone sang out let him know that he had an unheard
message.
Frowning, Reed
sat up in bed wondering how he could have missed a call. His cell phone was one thing that never left
his side. He let out a frustrated grunt
when he remembered that he had put his phone on silent mode shortly after they
had arrived at the
Reed got
out of bed and walked into the kitchen where his cell phone was plugged into
the wall charging. He flipped it open
and saw that he did indeed have one new message. Glad there weren’t more,
Reed hit the voice mail button, then punched in the number one in order to play
the message.
Hello, Reed. It’s Maggie Drake. I wanted to call and let you know that I was
able to talk with my father about your request. My father said he would be more than happy to
meet with you at your office. His
schedule is pretty full, but he’s willing to work out a time. Please give me a call and I’ll let you know
when he’s available. I’ll be looking
forward to your call.
Reed
picked up a pen sitting on top of the notepad by his phone. He was able to see enough in the dimly lit
room to write on the pad, “Call Maggie Drake”.
Reed stood
by the counter for a moment staring into the darkened hallway toward his
room. Staking his head, Reed made his
way back to his bed. As he settled back
into his sheets, he found his mind replaying the message he’d just heard. Every word rang through in crisp detail. Her voice echoed in his mind over and over
again. Maggie’s voice had a female
quality, yet didn’t reflect her petite stature. It was rich with power, and lined with lace.
Not for
the first time, Reed thought about his two brief meetings with her. Both times, she had left Reed with the
impression that she knew more than she was letting on. There were things that didn’t quite
connect. A lack of knowledge that filled
the spaces between her words with more questions than answers.
More
importantly, however were her expressions and body language. Every time she let her eyes meet with his,
hers held a strange insecurity that made him question whether she was telling
the truth. When she’d first seen the
picture of Willings, and claimed not to know him,
there was a definite flash of something—alarm—on her beautiful face.
Reed
closed his eyes and thought about her. His
focus slowly moved from her link to the murders to the feeling of being in her
presence. He remembered gazing into her
dark brown eyes, and how they lit up when she smiled. The last time he’d seen her, her dark hair had
been pulled back with every strand perfectly placed. He remembered the way she moved so close to
him that he could almost feel her energy.
Reed then
thought about their parting moments.
“Reed,” he repeated. “That’s my first name. Feel free to just call me Reed, okay?”
“Okay, Reed,” Maggie said with a
smile.
Reed
remembered the way she looked at him while she was standing in the doorway of
her shop. It was as if for one moment,
everything stopped around him. The sun
trickling in from the warm
As his
mind repainted her image, Reed slowly drifted away to sleep.